Noodles and Beef

December 26th, 2017 Week 52 of 52

In this week's issue:


Merry Christmas!

Santa looks

Merry Christmas, everyone!  From my family to yours, I hope everyone enjoyed their holidays.

My holiday was mostly enjoyable.  My Mom, brother, his girl-friend, and my step-dad John joined us this week for Christmas.  This meant i was playing host and spent little time with my chosen-family (my pups).

Clockwise from me: Alpha, my brother, his girlfriend, mom, step-dad John, angus, biff.

I can only handle small doses of my biological family.

Last year when mom visited, she introduced a brand new set of utensils that did not match my existing set. Total chaos.

Playing host is a little interesting with family.  Ideally, I would show them “my city,” which includes drag shows, burlesque, drugs,  leather, and food…but most of those aren’t family appropriate.  So I ended up giving them a food tour over three days.  Starting with local coffee favourite, Starbucks, followed by food of my neighborhood, and after running out of places to eat, I took them to the Chihuly glass gardens.  It started snowing in the glass garden, which was beautiful.

Pups were exhausted by my family.  So I split off from the pack to attend to familial duties.  🙁

Mom alerted me that dad was on a manic/depressive swing after relapsing on some old addictions.  The two of them have been in some form of 12-step for my entire life, but mom’s penchant for secrecy meant I only learned that mental illness was a thing when I moved out.  So I tried my best to keep them separate to avoid a family melt-down.  Sometimes that meant taking mom grocery shopping while dad “went for a walk,” a colloquialism for self-medicating.

We actually did pretty good.  The family drama bomb dropped after I said my goodbyes and sent them to the airport.  Narrowly missed that one.  Phew.

Christmas with my pups

With my family visiting, I had to break up Christmas into smaller bites to share with each of my pups.

Tank’s Christmas

After forgetting Christmas for the last few years, tank knew he had to make a strong effort this year to show his commitment to being a better partner. He gave thoughtful gifts to each of my pups, and commissioned this beautiful card from one of my new favourite artists, James Newland.  Tank also gifted me a signed copy of Jim French’s original Polaroids, for my gay art collection, and some rented time in a photo studio nearby.


Any one of these would have been able to stand on its own, but together they were all so thoughtful, I was speechless.

Thank you, pup.

angus christmas

Angus Christmas

I gifted angus some much-needed oversized underwear for his massive package (new jock in photo above!) and burlesque classes to take with his brother pup biff.

Angus gave me couple’s sewing classes…which I’ve wanted forever 😀  He found a cute boutique downtown that offered one-on-one classes, so I can finally learn my sewing machine.  My pups and I aren’t able to wear much off-the-rack, so this new skill will be very helpful.

Thank you pup 😀

angus worships

Mmm…angus butt.

His bulk is going very well.  I’m looking forward to making him a new swimsuit or tights 🙂

Alpha Christmas

Before my family arrived, I took alpha to a fancy (but ultimately disappointing) Italian restaurant for his gift: a trip to New Zealand exploring hot springs together.

He’s kind of known I was getting us a flight for a while, but was still overcome when I shared the details of our coming adventure.  His gift to me was a float in a sensory deprivation pod 😀

Biff and BP?

BP is in Mexico for Christmas, but I’m taking him glass blowing when he gets back.

Biff got some sexy new Slick it Up and is doing burlesque with angus…I don’t have any good photos of his sexy look yet.

Christmas from John and Jacob

New suspenders from Fierce Drag Jewels

So…they’re a little long, but I was gifted a pair of shimmering rhinestone suspenders from my friends John and Jacob.  I will likely be wearing this to DragCon next year.

Tank at 280lbs

Tank at 280

Another Christmas gift I got: tank grew to 280lbs.  He’s looking huge 😀

Tank at 280


Life at 270lbs+

2006 to 2017.
140lbs to 270lbs.

I’m adjusting to life at 270lbs+. This is my all-time biggest and heaviest, which presents some new challenges:

  • I can’t breath when I lay down. My neck is too thick and my chest too heavy. I need a CPAP to sleep and nap.
  • I’ve outgrown almost all my nice clothes.
  • Ugh. The clothes thing is especially annoying because I thought I’d never get bigger than 240, so I invested in custom tailored pieces.
  • My knees ache and my feet throb if I’m standing for an extended period.
  • I get out of breath easily.  I can’t even tie my shoes without feeling winded.

I still want to try and hit 280lbs…maybe even 300lbs.  It feels possible.

Was it good for you too?

Thank you for reading!
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