Noodles and Beef

Anonymous asks:
probably irrelevant to most of the questions you get asked here. how do I know a person's my best friend?

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This chart is a rough guide to “Social Distance.“  I can’t remember who first described this (Aza Raskin, maybe?) but it’s a pretty simple concept:

  • You’re at the center of your social world
  • The closet person is your “Best Friend”
  • The next closest group of people are your friends and close family
  • Further from that are Acquaintances and Distant Relatives
  • Anyone beyond that is a stranger

People’s placement on this chart changes.  Most my “close friends" from high school have moved into the “acquaintances" group.  Some are even “Strangers" to me now.

My best friend these days is Chuck (pictured right).  I’ve known Chuck for at least five years, since I moved to SF.  Back then, we were just acquaintances.  But, we slowly became friends, and after my breakup with Chad, he stepped up and became my best friend.

We hang out often, confide trust in each other, and push ourselves to be more than we are.  This is not an absolute definition, but for me, a “Best Friend" is someone you share a platonic love with.  In the past, the only people I had platonic love for I also shared romantic love…so my best friends were always my boyfriends.

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This is a venn diagram of the three types of love (consummate love left out as it’s something that develops over time).  

My friendship with Chuck is strictly Platonic.  Whereas, his relationship with his husband is the intersection of all three types of Love.

I used to believe that your partner should be your only best friend…but after my last two relationships, I have a much greater value for Platonic Best Friends like Chuck.

Anonymous asks:
probably irrelevant to most of the questions you get asked here. how do I know a person's my best friend?

image

This chart is a rough guide to “Social Distance.”  I can’t remember who first described this (Aza Raskin, maybe?) but it’s a pretty simple concept:

  • You’re at the center of your social world
  • The closet person is your “Best Friend”
  • The next closest group of people are your friends and close family
  • Further from that are Acquaintances and Distant Relatives
  • Anyone beyond that is a stranger

People’s placement on this chart changes.  Most my “close friends” from high school have moved into the “acquaintances” group.  Some are even “Strangers” to me now.

My best friend these days is Chuck (pictured right).  I’ve known Chuck for at least five years, since I moved to SF.  Back then, we were just acquaintances.  But, we slowly became friends, and after my breakup with Chad, he stepped up and became my best friend.

We hang out often, confide trust in each other, and push ourselves to be more than we are.  This is not an absolute definition, but for me, a “Best Friend” is someone you share a platonic love with.  In the past, the only people I had platonic love for I also shared romantic love…so my best friends were always my boyfriends.

image

This is a venn diagram of the three types of love (consummate love left out as it’s something that develops over time).  

My friendship with Chuck is strictly Platonic.  Whereas, his relationship with his husband is the intersection of all three types of Love.

I used to believe that your partner should be your only best friend…but after my last two relationships, I have a much greater value for Platonic Best Friends like Chuck.

Anonymous asks:
I look at stocky guys and I feel this almost erotic kind of jealousy because I'd like to have a body like theirs, but I have a crush on this girl in my art class. does this mean I'm bisexual? I find bigger guys more attractive, but I'd still very much like to marry a wife, have kids, and start a family together.

Human Sexuality is not so black and white! There is much more than just gay/straight/bi. It’s possible to be physically attracted to men, but emotionally attracted to women.  It’s also possible to be gay and still want a nuclear family.

I sort of have a chart for this:

This radar chart graphs Human Sexuality of Gay (red) and Straight (blue) men across the five attributes that Dr Kinsey attributes to sexuality.

The Straight Male in my example is 100% Biologically Male (born as a male with full male parts), identifies as a male (uses the mens bathroom, etc),               expresses himself as a male (shops in Mens clothing stores, etc), is 100% attracted to the opposite sex, and affiliates with other men of the same identity.

The Gay Male in my example is just like his Straight counterpart, except he expresses himself a little less Masculinely, and is only attracted to the same sex.

Kinsey’s sexuality matrix allows for many degrees of expression across all these attributes.  You can be a Biological Male that Identifies as Female but Expresses as Androgynous, yet is Attracted to Men and Women equally, and affiliates with nobody.

Why can’t you have a Straight Family while only being sexually attracted to Gay Men? Plenty of Republicans do this already.

Anonymous asks:
I look at stocky guys and I feel this almost erotic kind of jealousy because I'd like to have a body like theirs, but I have a crush on this girl in my art class. does this mean I'm bisexual? I find bigger guys more attractive, but I'd still very much like to marry a wife, have kids, and start a family together.

Human Sexuality is not so black and white! There is much more than just gay/straight/bi. It’s possible to be physically attracted to men, but emotionally attracted to women.  It’s also possible to be gay and still want a nuclear family.

I sort of have a chart for this:

This radar chart graphs Human Sexuality of Gay (red) and Straight (blue) men across the five attributes that Dr Kinsey attributes to sexuality.

The Straight Male in my example is 100% Biologically Male (born as a male with full male parts), identifies as a male (uses the mens bathroom, etc),               expresses himself as a male (shops in Mens clothing stores, etc), is 100% attracted to the opposite sex, and affiliates with other men of the same identity.

The Gay Male in my example is just like his Straight counterpart, except he expresses himself a little less Masculinely, and is only attracted to the same sex.

Kinsey’s sexuality matrix allows for many degrees of expression across all these attributes.  You can be a Biological Male that Identifies as Female but Expresses as Androgynous, yet is Attracted to Men and Women equally, and affiliates with nobody.

Why can’t you have a Straight Family while only being sexually attracted to Gay Men? Plenty of Republicans do this already.

Browser and Operating System use by Gay Cliques

Using browser data from Gay Cliques Census respondents, we can see that the average Gay male is pretty tech savvy:

Nearly one-third of gay men use Macs, 80% use an up-to-date web browser and 10% took my survey on their iPhone!  

Nevertheless, this is the average.  Things get really interesting when we segment based on cliques:

  • Otters are the techiest of Gay Cliques, with nearly half of all Otters using a Mac over a PC and >90% up-to-date web browser.
  • Daddies are the least technical Gay Clique, they’re the highest users of Internet Explorer, and only ~40% have up-to-date web browsers.
  • Cubs and Twinks prefer Android to iPhones

Sorry for not making any census-related updates for the past few months.  I had started to get bored and was working on other meaningful projects.

Nevertheless, I can’t believe I haven’t done this graph yet:

Where did these cliques come from?

As I’ve mentioned before, these cliques/labels/social groupings are automatically generated from survey input.  I didn’t come up with them, you guys did.  When there is enough data to be considered statistically significant, the clique is surfaced.  (Thats why bulls were added later).

What Cliques are people actually aware of?

This graph shows the top 17 cliques, ordered by the percent of people who are aware  of each clique.  At 93%, almost everyone knows what a Bear is, 1-in-3 know what a Chaser is, but very few people are aware of Bulls or Gainers.

This graph is pretty even across every dimension—age, clique, location, etc—except when it comes to Chickens.

What is a Chicken?  WIth only 21 people self-identifying as Chicken I can’t say what an average Chicken looks like.  Whatever they are, it seems to only be used by older generations and folks in the UK.  It has completely fallen out of use by the younger generation:

image

Chasers, Gainers, Bulls and Muscle Cubs are the most clique-conscious (aware of 18+ cliques on average) while Twinks and people who don’t associate with cliques are the least aware (10 or less on average).

At what point do these labels become bonafide Social Groups?  Bears and Cubs are certainly qualified with >90% awareness, but what about Bulls?  Only 1-in-5 people are aware of their existence.

I’m sure everyone has experienced this phenomenon: the further away you are from someone you find attractive, the more they’re into you.  Meanwhile, undateable trolls are pretty much always into you at any distance.

Quick update on my tumblr stats thing.

I wasn’t happy with the quality of the tool, so I’ve spruced up the layout a bit and added a new section about who is leaving notes on your blog.  It’s sort of the reverse of the tumblr crushes feature, this shows who has a crush on your posts.

Remember when I threw-down some ghetto graphs with anonymous?

It’s a little rough, but I’ve released the tool that lets you create these charts for your tumblr blog.  Additionally, this tool analyzes the type of posts you make to tell you your “Blogging Style.”  (For example, I’m a Visual-Creator because I mostly post original photos).

Enjoy: The Simple Tumblr Stats Tool

Edit: I’ve updated the tool slightly to include details on who leaves you notes. Read about it here.

bearbeef-deactivated20130612 asks:
How does an incredibly handsome guy like yourself juggles being a creative director and building that perfect body of yours? In all honestly perhaps I am biased your body is the way a man body should look its such a perfect and balanced beefy muscle. Seriously, how do you do all of this?

Work is easy.  I *have* to be at work.  Lunch time is when I workout, then the evening is my free time where I work on personal projects and fret over how unhappy I am with my body.

I think it really helps to not have any friends. Otherwise I’d be hanging out instead of working on graphs, photo projects and doodling imaginary friends.

Where are you on the Fat/Muscle grid?

(A chart I did from last year, deserved a reblog)