I am your host, Noodles and Beef, and welcome to my blog. It's my creative dumping ground and journal. I post work from my photo projects, sketches from my notepad, and infographics from my research. Sometimes I write about my body dysmorphia but more often I post photos of my butt. I am in a D/s relationship with two wonderful pups. Your hair looks amazing today.

Anyway, thanks for reading my blog, I hope you enjoy it!

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carnenchiladas:

Master sent us a chef prepared dinner and flowers to remind us how much he loves us, and that he thinks of us all the time even while he’s away. Love you sooooo much, Master! Come home soon, we miss you!

I love my pups!  I’m sending daily tokens of affection during my trip, from small reminders of my love to catered meals keeping them on track with their diet. Anything I can to show them how special they are when I can’t do it in person.
Sigh, I miss you both so much…can’t wait to come home.

carnenchiladas:

Master sent us a chef prepared dinner and flowers to remind us how much he loves us, and that he thinks of us all the time even while he’s away. Love you sooooo much, Master! Come home soon, we miss you!

I love my pups!  I’m sending daily tokens of affection during my trip, from small reminders of my love to catered meals keeping them on track with their diet. Anything I can to show them how special they are when I can’t do it in person.

Sigh, I miss you both so much…can’t wait to come home.

Reblogged from carnenchiladas
Why do you eat so much poutine?
otter-bocks-cub

Excuse you.

I’ll tell you why I eat so much damn poutine.

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Look at that.  LOOK AT IT.  Pulled pork over fries with cheese curds.  Its like staring into the FACE OF GOD and he tells you YOU ARE WORTHY OF EATING ME.

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Oh my god, is that…?  YES IT IS: Japanese curry chicken over yukon gold fries!!!  Salty, Spicy, Sweet, Umami…what is this?!  A FIFTH FLAVOUR?!?!  The best elements of every flavour combine to unlock the ULTIMATE FORM OF TASTE INCARNATE: poutine.

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Have you ever eaten something so incredible you cried?  Meet duck confit poutine: self-actualization as food.  You are special, you are loved, you are worthy, you are wanted…and poutine has brought you there.

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Behold: classic poutine.  Deceivingly simple.  You’d never know a life changing experience was just a bite away.

If you could capture the human condition—love, loss, joy, sadness, ecstasy, pokemon—into food, you would have a recipe for classic poutine.

What I’m saying is: you have not lived until you’ve poutine.

Speaking of living in a bara comic, I imagine this is what it would look like.
brandedbulltank just gave me this incredible birthday gift: he commissioned my favourite artist, hawtcherry, to draw the wonderful pups of my life and myself (as beefy sexy furries) all cuddled up together.  There’s lil pup on the left as a shiba inu, Chuck pup top right as a St Bernard, big pup as a boar, tank at my feet as a big red-headed bull, and myself as a bull in the middle of the pile.
Wow.  Just…wow.
I’m speechless, its incredible.  One of my favourite pieces by hawtcherry…he’s incredibly talented and I can recognize everyone in this pic even as hyper-sexualized anthropomorphized versions of themselves.  I love it.

Speaking of living in a bara comic, I imagine this is what it would look like.

brandedbulltank just gave me this incredible birthday gift: he commissioned my favourite artist, hawtcherry, to draw the wonderful pups of my life and myself (as beefy sexy furries) all cuddled up together.  There’s lil pup on the left as a shiba inu, Chuck pup top right as a St Bernard, big pup as a boar, tank at my feet as a big red-headed bull, and myself as a bull in the middle of the pile.

Wow.  Just…wow.

I’m speechless, its incredible.  One of my favourite pieces by hawtcherry…he’s incredibly talented and I can recognize everyone in this pic even as hyper-sexualized anthropomorphized versions of themselves.  I love it.

While exploring Toronto I took big pup to catch a very special movie at a local theater.

I took him to see our movie.

I had rented out the entire theater, made movie posters, had tickets printed up, and created a feature length about our life together. From when we first met to our adventures around the world. All set to the soundtrack from Pixar’s Up.

At the end of the movie I got on my knee and proposed:

"To my wonderful pup, you are my greatest adventure. Thank you for every moment…will you marry me?"

He said yes!

Is the guy that owns the farm your real dad? Sorry if that's a stupid question I just remember you saying your parents kicked you out because you were gay.
Anonymous

My mom married five different guys, three of which raised me in different parts of my life.  it gets confusing.

image

This is my biological dad.  We had a difficult time during my teenage years and I am just now starting to connect with him.  He sold his house and moved my half-sister and step-mom to a farm far away from everything. Its nice but very remote.  I love getting to hang out with them.

My dad-dad has become very supportive, aggressively so.  Him and my step-mom are very welcoming of my non-traditional relationship and partners.

This is my step-Dad.  I call him “dad” because he was with my mom the longest and spent the most time with me.  He was a vegan, Master-level bodybuilder, and his nutritional advice, powerlifting routine, and nudist lifestyle shaped me as an adult.  The photo on the right is him right now, almost 60-years-old.  WOW.

I wish I got more time with him these days, but its hard to reach him. He’s very busy.

I don’t have a photo of my other step-dad and I.  But, I do have a photo of my brother from when he visited for my step-dad’s funeral.  As a strong supporter of Prop 8, he and I had a very difficult time connecting as father and son when I came out.  Cut from the will, ostracized, ignored, I don’t feel like he considered me a son as much as I considered him my dad.  I couldn’t even visit him when he was diagnosed with cancer.  I wrote him a letter instead.

I have many dads, not even including the daddies of my life.  Ha.

Hi everyone,
I’ve had a few questions about how awesome being in a triad is and if folks should try it.  From a Dom’s perspective, its really awesome having two pups, but there are some logistical issues nobody seems to talk about with triads.
In the world of relationships, the standard model is a “couple,” so we run into some issues being in a triad.  Nobody warns you about this stuff.  For example:
Time management: each person in the relationship adds that much more time to everyday activities.  Getting ready to go out?  Add an hour for each extra partner.
Holding hands: we end up taking over the entire sidewalk, red-rovering anyone who happens to come in our path.
Working out: having one gym partner is perfect, but two adds too much rest time between sets and becomes inefficient with all the groping that inevitably happens when you work out.
Two player video games
You have to wait for a four-person table for brunch
Couple’s specials at restaurants: granted, each of us end up getting the couples special quantity of food for ourselves…but still frustrating.
You will never get onto the KissCam™ because 3+ men making out is very difficult
Two person bicycles
There are no 3-way spaghetti pieces
Showering: we can barely fit two bodybuilders into our shower, but three?  Impossible.
Zero representation in media: when was the last time you saw a poly-fidelity D/s Master/pup/pup relationship on TV or in a movie? Its like we don’t exist. Wake up America!
IKEA: I can handle a one-on-one couples fight at IKEA.  I might even enjoy it.  But two-on-one?!  No, we don’t need a MALM organizer!!!
Parties where you only get a +1 when you’ve got +2 :(
Valentines Day: everything seems targeted at couples.  But naked chocolate fondue is for 3+ so we’re good.
This is an incomplete (and kinda tongue-in-cheek) list, but y’all get the picture.

Hi everyone,

I’ve had a few questions about how awesome being in a triad is and if folks should try it.  From a Dom’s perspective, its really awesome having two pups, but there are some logistical issues nobody seems to talk about with triads.

In the world of relationships, the standard model is a “couple,” so we run into some issues being in a triad.  Nobody warns you about this stuff.  For example:

  • Time management: each person in the relationship adds that much more time to everyday activities.  Getting ready to go out?  Add an hour for each extra partner.
  • Holding hands: we end up taking over the entire sidewalk, red-rovering anyone who happens to come in our path.
  • Working out: having one gym partner is perfect, but two adds too much rest time between sets and becomes inefficient with all the groping that inevitably happens when you work out.
  • Two player video games
  • You have to wait for a four-person table for brunch
  • Couple’s specials at restaurants: granted, each of us end up getting the couples special quantity of food for ourselves…but still frustrating.
  • You will never get onto the KissCam™ because 3+ men making out is very difficult
  • Two person bicycles

  • There are no 3-way spaghetti pieces
  • Showering: we can barely fit two bodybuilders into our shower, but three?  Impossible.
  • Zero representation in media: when was the last time you saw a poly-fidelity D/s Master/pup/pup relationship on TV or in a movie? Its like we don’t exist. Wake up America!
  • IKEA: I can handle a one-on-one couples fight at IKEA.  I might even enjoy it.  But two-on-one?!  No, we don’t need a MALM organizer!!!
  • Parties where you only get a +1 when you’ve got +2 :(
  • Valentines Day: everything seems targeted at couples.  But naked chocolate fondue is for 3+ so we’re good.

This is an incomplete (and kinda tongue-in-cheek) list, but y’all get the picture.

Reblogged from noodlesandbeef
Why aren't there more bears of color in bear-centric media?
therealproteinpowder2486

Thats a really good question.  Let’s look at the data first:

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People of Color are underrepresented in the bear community because bears are mostly into other bears and the most self-identified bears are white.  (Source: gay cliques census, 2/3s of bears and cubs are into their own type; >80% of self-identified bears are white).

Most bears are white.  Most bears are into other bears, who happen to be mostly white guys. So it makes sense that the bear community would cater to its majority audience…except that the bear community was originally designed to be inclusive.

How bad is it?

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Bearracuda proudly states that they’re the largest attended bear dance party and most prolific gay dance event in the US.  Despite this, they don’t use people of colour in their promotions.

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The top dating apps for bears, scruff and growlr, don’t use people of colour in any of their app screenshots, ads, or promotions.  Some bear dating sites, like Bear411, won’t even allow people of colour (particularly asians) to join their site.

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The biggest bear runs in the world, Lazy Bear, TBRU, and Ptown Bear Week don’t use people of colour in their ads, promotional flyers, or websites.

Correction 5/27: TBRU has used people of colour in previous years’ flyers. Thank you, J Larry for pointing this out!  I’m sorry for not digging deeper.

Without some representation in bear-centric media, the bear community sends a strong message that people of colour are not welcome.

But, its not all bad.  There are some very prominent people in the bear community who do not practice discrimination against skin colour and even include us in their work.

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Where the Bears Are has always had a varied cast of bears representing different ethnicities (like me), Beach Bear Weekend is a new bear run that uses people of colour in their promotions, Bear Invasion has a balanced representation of ethnic minorities (like me).

People of colour are underrepresented by the bear community, but we can change that by supporting bear parties, events, and media that is inclusive.

hey hey. I just moved to San Fran and from what I can tell, ur pretty familiar with the city. any recommendations for a good time or ur faves here?
dreamzweaverin

Welcome to the best city in the world!  

Full disclosure: I was born and raised in the bay area and have had an SF zip code for the last 6 years.  So I’m a little biased.

Please keep in mind that having a “good time” is subjective.  Enjoyment isn’t universal, so understand that my suggestions are based on my interests.  (Related: 5 awesome things to do in SF).

Noodles and Beef’s Good Times SF Guide

Flagging in the Park

FitP starts this Sunday (May 11th) and is the best tea dance of the summer.  Flagging seems to transcend gay cliques and the result is a very diverse, inclusive, and friendly environment where you get to dance to awesome music.  See dates for Flagging in the Park here →

Fort Funston

Fort Funston is a former harbor defense installation located in the southwestern corner of San Francisco. The abandoned military silos make gorgeous backdrops for photo shoots and the surrounding wildlife preserve is an easy hike.  Its near my house so I go often.

Kabuki Hot Springs and Spa

Raised by nudists, my family spent a lot of time at mixed sex nude baths where we’d hangout with friends and talk about social issues.  Moving to SF was a bit of a culture shock: bath houses are used for sex in the rest of the world.  Kabuki is one of the few spas in SF that isn’t a seedy sex spa.  Protip: use the cucumber soap with the salt in the steam room.  MAGIC!

Also fun but I’m too lazy to write a block of text about them:

WHAT MAKES YOU FEEL BETTER WHEN YOU ARE IN A BAD MOOD?
tumblrbot

When I’m in a bad mood I hyper-focus on whatever put me in that mood and it gets progressively more upsetting because I can’t stop thinking about it.

The only solution is to derail my train of thought with a distraction.  Psychology Today says TETRIS is good at this because our brain has limited short-term capacity.  Any sufficiently complicated task will block these bad memories from being stored and perpetuating that bad mood…as long as it happens within the 6-hour block that short term memory can be mitigated. 

Here are my top five distracting activities I use to put myself in a better mood:

  1. TETRIS, SUDOKU, or Scrabble on my phone
  2. 20 minutes of bike riding (any HIIT cardio works)
  3. Window shopping
  4. Circuit Party with people I love
  5. Go somewhere in nature and disconnect

Each of these has different benefits/drawbacks.  (Eg, I can’t use #1 in a social setting because its rude).  Knowing how “bad moods” work is very helpful in overcoming them.

Did hot air balloon ride through Napa and Yountville…an incredible experience, thank you, big pup. We shared the balloon with a couple…when we hit 2,000 feet they exchanged a tearfelt proposal. I’ve never witnessed one before, it was very beautiful. 

I left my big-corp-job last month to work full-time for this non-profit that I had been freelancing with on the side.  Choosing passion over profit was difficult, but I’m glad I did it.

Where big-corp-job was unfulfilling, lil-non-profit gave me unfettered creative freedom and the satisfaction of making a positive political change: immigration reform.

I’m happy to announce ‪Selfies4Reform‬, an app I’ve been working on to help push immigration reform forward. Take a selfie, write a message to your rep, and we’ll send a physical postcard to your rep.

Reps receive 500 emails to every 1 physical letter, so the transitive property states that 1 letter == 500 emails in power.  But letters are hard.  By making it as easy as taking a selfie, more people can get in touch with their reps and encourage the change we need.

Built in a couple weeks, so its a bit rough.  But, let me know what you guys think:

A couple days ago, I wrote a post about how Chuck and I first met and befriended each other.  Chuck felt my version wasn’t very accurate and has sent me a rebuttal, which I’ve posted below:
Dear Noodles and Beef, 
Hi, this is your best friend, Chuck - long-time reader, first-time writer. I couldn’t help but notice that you posted a response to a recent question asking how we met. Naturally, I’m always honored to be included in some way on your blog. However, I feel like you may have inadvertently missed a few key details about our meeting and subsequent torrid friendship that I’d like to clear up.
(Cue swirling mist and digital time-travel music)
Now for what really happened….
I first met Dylan at the 440 bar in late 2007 or early 2008. He was gogo dancing that night for the first time (though, at 20,  he technically wasn’t old enough to be in the bar). I could tell Dylan wasn’t a typical gogo dancer - he wasn’t being cheesy and working the crowd for tips, but just seemed to have a good time dancing. During one of his breaks, we started chatting and hit it off - enough for him to eventually scribble down his number and give it to me.
Now even though I was in an open relationship, I’ve made a personal rule about not calling guys who give me their numbers in bars. Given the context of the situation, Dylan’s age, and him being way out of my league, it never occurred to me that he’d actually want to just hang out as friends. That’s an error that I’ve regretted ever since.
Luckily, we NEXT met at our mutual friend’s party a few months later. I was overjoyed to reconnect with him, though my own insecurity still told me that there was no way a guy like Dylan would want to hang out with a dorky fat guy like me. (At the time, I drank like a fish and had the belly of a Beluga whale.) I don’t remember the alleged “beefy Asian guys” who were surrounding me, but I do remember Dylan.
We would continue to see each other through mutual friends here and there over the next couple of years. He was close friends with another mutual friend of ours, so I’d see them hanging out together or sometimes with one of his boyfriends. He always seemed to be living an awesome life, and I didn’t want to intrude on it, though I loved seeing him whenever I could. For example, I first encouraged Dylan to join our current gym, even though he thought he’d never be able to get any working out done because he’d be too “distracted” by the men around him.
Going to Provincetown for Bear Week had become a frequent destination for me, and one year I found out that Dylan would be going, too. We talked about it in advance, and he told me that he was going to be staying at a hostel. So I made sure that I gave him my number and invited him over to the house I was sharing with friends. I had asked some housemates if it would be okay if Dylan stayed on our couch instead of the hostel, but they weren’t comfortable with the idea. It wasn’t until one of the roommates left abruptly that I was able to offer an open room to Dylan. We hung out a lot that week and became better friends. At the end of the trip, I asked Dylan if we could hang out more in SF.
We stayed in contact during the next year, though we still didn’t hang out. Dylan had started dating an ex who didn’t really want Dylan having outside friends, and I decided to respect that. But that didn’t stop us from making plans for Provincetown the following year, where we shared a room and hung out pretty much the entire week. We became really good friends during this period, though we still didn’t get to hang out that much post-Ptown due to his ex.
When they broke up a few months before Dylan’s birthday trip to Cancun, Dylan invited me to join him. I had recently been laid off work and jumped at the chance to have a big friend-bonding experience in Mexico. One amazing time later and we’ve been best friends ever since.

A couple days ago, I wrote a post about how Chuck and I first met and befriended each other.  Chuck felt my version wasn’t very accurate and has sent me a rebuttal, which I’ve posted below:

Dear Noodles and Beef, 

Hi, this is your best friend, Chuck - long-time reader, first-time writer. I couldn’t help but notice that you posted a response to a recent question asking how we met. Naturally, I’m always honored to be included in some way on your blog. However, I feel like you may have inadvertently missed a few key details about our meeting and subsequent torrid friendship that I’d like to clear up.

(Cue swirling mist and digital time-travel music)

Now for what really happened….

I first met Dylan at the 440 bar in late 2007 or early 2008. He was gogo dancing that night for the first time (though, at 20,  he technically wasn’t old enough to be in the bar). I could tell Dylan wasn’t a typical gogo dancer - he wasn’t being cheesy and working the crowd for tips, but just seemed to have a good time dancing. During one of his breaks, we started chatting and hit it off - enough for him to eventually scribble down his number and give it to me.

Now even though I was in an open relationship, I’ve made a personal rule about not calling guys who give me their numbers in bars. Given the context of the situation, Dylan’s age, and him being way out of my league, it never occurred to me that he’d actually want to just hang out as friends. That’s an error that I’ve regretted ever since.

Luckily, we NEXT met at our mutual friend’s party a few months later. I was overjoyed to reconnect with him, though my own insecurity still told me that there was no way a guy like Dylan would want to hang out with a dorky fat guy like me. (At the time, I drank like a fish and had the belly of a Beluga whale.) I don’t remember the alleged “beefy Asian guys” who were surrounding me, but I do remember Dylan.

We would continue to see each other through mutual friends here and there over the next couple of years. He was close friends with another mutual friend of ours, so I’d see them hanging out together or sometimes with one of his boyfriends. He always seemed to be living an awesome life, and I didn’t want to intrude on it, though I loved seeing him whenever I could. For example, I first encouraged Dylan to join our current gym, even though he thought he’d never be able to get any working out done because he’d be too “distracted” by the men around him.

Going to Provincetown for Bear Week had become a frequent destination for me, and one year I found out that Dylan would be going, too. We talked about it in advance, and he told me that he was going to be staying at a hostel. So I made sure that I gave him my number and invited him over to the house I was sharing with friends. I had asked some housemates if it would be okay if Dylan stayed on our couch instead of the hostel, but they weren’t comfortable with the idea. It wasn’t until one of the roommates left abruptly that I was able to offer an open room to Dylan. We hung out a lot that week and became better friends. At the end of the trip, I asked Dylan if we could hang out more in SF.

We stayed in contact during the next year, though we still didn’t hang out. Dylan had started dating an ex who didn’t really want Dylan having outside friends, and I decided to respect that. But that didn’t stop us from making plans for Provincetown the following year, where we shared a room and hung out pretty much the entire week. We became really good friends during this period, though we still didn’t get to hang out that much post-Ptown due to his ex.

When they broke up a few months before Dylan’s birthday trip to Cancun, Dylan invited me to join him. I had recently been laid off work and jumped at the chance to have a big friend-bonding experience in Mexico. One amazing time later and we’ve been best friends ever since.

How did you and Chuck meet?
kazublaze

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Thats me in the black dress shirt, thumbs out, being a dork.

I originally met Chuck on March 29th, 2008 at a birthday party; he was friends with the host who had hurriedly invited me over Bear411.  Recently single and eager to make gay friends, I took the train to SF wearing my nicest dress shirt (see above).

The party host quickly introduced me to everyone and thats when I met Chuck.  He was sandwiched between a few beefy asian guys, so its understandable he doesn’t remember 140-pound me meekly introducing myself.

image

My next interaction with Chuck was at the 440.  I was gogo dancing for charity, which took everything I was bad at and turned it into fund-raising: dancing, socializing, being at a bar.  (This photo is actually my second attempt at charitable gogo dancing a couple months later…don’t have any pics from the 440 that night).

I started talking up Chuck and I thought we had hit it off, so I gave him my contact info so we could hang out now that I lived in the city.

Chuck never contacted me, but we saw each other at mutual friends’ events so I tried to befriend him often.

Two years later, I went to ptown for the first time.  I got a room at the hostel with three other people and had no idea who I would run into or befriend at my first solo gay vacation.

Turns out Chuck was there with his beefy asian entourage.  I didn’t know anyone else so I hung around them a lot.  The last day of the trip, Chuck turned to me and said “You’re pretty cool, why don’t we hang out more in SF?”

I had been trying to befriend Chuck for, like, three years at this point.  So, I was like, “FINALLY.  YES.  LETS HANG OUT ALREADY.”  Chuck proceeds to ignore me for another 8 months.

For my 24th birthday, I booked a gay vacation in Cancun with my closest friend innerbear and my boyfriend at that time…so when I became single a month before Cancun, I offered Chuck my ex’s place.  

This was the vacation that we really connected as good friends.  After this trip, Chuck and I started hanging out on a regular basis.  Thats the very long history of how I met and befriended Chuck.


Hold on there, this is important.

Hi, I'm Noodles and Beef and welcome to my blog. How are you? Your hair looks great today. What's your secret? I think its important we get to know each other a little bit before you continue.

I've been updating this blog for over 13-years to help me remember and better appreciate my life experiences. I blog for my own benefit, so the content can be extremely personal and sometimes that makes people uncomfortable.

We just met, so I'm not sure what makes you uncomfortable.

Thats why you need to be at least 18-years-old to continue...and if it makes you uncomfortable, just stop reading my blog, okay?


I agree