Noodles and Beef

Genetic “ethnicity” results from 23andme.

So.

Yeah.

It turns out I’m not even Asian.

Huh.

Man.  Ethnic identity is weird.

What does it mean now that I’m no longer Filipino…but Polynesian?





I guess I could get that tribal tattoo now.

alphabeef:

brandedbulltank:

bit rusty so i thought some smut would get my engines starting. hope u like it, bun! <;


[Tank: I’m not sure if I can fully explain what’s going on in this sexy image.

I’m going to pretend that this is a screenshot from my new ‘magical-girl’ anime ‘Sub-Service Beta’. This image depicts the big-balled Tanuki mascot-character revealing to the humble protagonist that he has been marked for service and he is destined for a great journey, a heroes journey if you would, for him seek out his other eight brothers and then ascend great Mt Toro to meet their Master.

This is awesome! Thank you SO much]

This is both sexy and adorable. Congratulations to my brother-in-service @brandedbulltank for earning Master’s brand! Wait…EIGHT brothers??? Did Master go on a collaring spree in Australia that I don’t know about?

This is amazing and very accurate. Tank’s magical puppy transformation is invoked with a cute tanuki sidekick.

theartofoscarwaldes:

Horny Muscle Daddy … Looking for trouble ?

Everything this man draws is erotic perfection

carnenchiladas:

Masters valentine card for me, I love it so much. Thank you Master, you’re the best! Love you with all my everything

I love you pup, happy Valentine’s!

greatmantis:

All done about. Thanks to Willhelm Lamprecht for the use of his photo. #art #fineart #painting #portrait #acrylicpainting #oilpainting.

This is breathtaking. The tie especially. I feel like I’ve stepped into a groggy dream mid flight. Beautiful.

Gym sighting: Shower Daddy

Ahh, I’ve missed these.  #gym-sighting is an art project where I draw someone I saw while working out, usually accompanied by some erotic fiction.

This beefy fella was in the shower with his gym glove.  How could I not draw him?

I’m a little rusty.  Forgive me.

Thin. Awkward. Dirt skinned.  Heath inhaled sharply.  It was as if a lifetime of erotic fantasies involving his exact opposite had manifested into a physical form.  There he was, struggling to do bicep curls in the smith machine while wearing jeans, like he’d never been in a gym before.

Fuck me.” Heath growled to himself, his cock straining against his gym shorts.

The twinkish ingénu sashayed from the gym floor to the locker-room.  Heath was in hot pursuit, sniffing the air, following the lingering scent of the boy’s body lotion.  It was pina colada.

“The showers.  Of course.”  Heath kicked off his gym shorts and tanktop in one swift motion.  There was no time to put them away in his locker or remove his left gym glove.

The boy was fussing with the shower knob, tweaking it slightly before gingerly testing the temperature with his toe.

Heath sauntered past, taking the next closest shower head with his right hand to adjust the stream for his 6-foot-2-inch frame.  He closed his eyes, arched his back, and slowly pushed his meaty rump back like he was offering the kid a couple Christmas hams.  

In his erotic fantasies, this is where the cripplingly awkward kid would approach him.  Break the silence with his cracking, pre-pubescent voice.  Usually a painfully weak pickup line about how he looked like a superhero from his favourite indy comic.  The graceless lack of bravado was his kryptonite, stronger than any bondage…it made him powerless, vulnerable, weak.  

…And he loved it.

brandedbulltank:

Yesterday was my 26th Birthday.

Master went out of his way to make sure it was very special, even though I was working through most of it.

In the morning he dropped me off with a kiss, afterwards he came back with balloons, party hats and small cupcakes for the rest of crew and a big carrot cupcake for me.

Master and I have a game where the more jealous you can make your colleagues, the more you win.

Then during my lunch break he came back he came back with delicious curry burritos.

Finally, after work we went to Catch, an amazing seafood restaurant, where he gave me this beautiful card. I was so moved by it I cried.

Thank you so much Master. You really know how to make a slave feel special on his birthday.

I love you so much *whimper*. Thank you for having me.

I love you pup, so glad you had a good birthday

This morning, I asked y’all to submit selfies, favourite colour, and animal, and I was going to try and draw you as that animal and colour.

Okay. A little ambitious.  Definitely too difficult.

I’m sorry :(  everything I tried sucked today.  It’s too embarrassing to post so I’m going to try a different warm-up.  

Sorry again :x

Noodles and Beef - Submit — Submit

Okay!  Submission gates are open again!

Send me a selfie and include your favorite color and animal.  I’ll try to draw as many folks as I can during my warm-ups today.

Thank you!

Edit: wow! Right away two people submitted without following the prompt!  I cannot draw people who don’t follow the prompt :(

okay, I’m full up. Closing submissions for today.

Second batch of warm-up busts.  My hand is cramping, so I have to stop for tonight.  Thank you everyone who submitted!  I’m sorry if I didn’t get to you, the response was overwhelming D:

  1. @thesartor 
  2. @sausagewallet
  3. @opaque-obscurity
  4. @truenorthstrongfree
  5. @bobsledaz
  6. @kevin-comics
  7. @JLNorthrup

I’ll be doing another round tomorrow morning if you want to try again.

Noodles and Beef - Submit — Submit

I’m taking submissions for my drawing warm ups today. Can’t promise I’ll get to everyone, but send me a photo of yourself and I’ll try doodling you. Badly.