Noodles and Beef

Anonymous asks:
Hi Dylan and Pups, I have enjoyed reading your adventures, trials and life experiences over the last couple of years. As a native Washingtonian I just wanted to give you a heads up about living in Seattle. You will need a car to get around the area. This includes going to the East side (Bellevue, Kirkland, Redmond) as well as to the peninsula and to points north of Seattle. If you would like more info on area events, both Gay and Straight please let me know in your blog.

Yes!  Please send all the tips!

Big pup and I have cars, there’s zipcar near our house, and I think pup Bef wants to get a car when he moves…we’ll see.

Anonymous asks:
Could you please back up your claim that "a lot of people seem very fake" from Los Angeles with specific examples? Thank you.

The “Fake Los Angeles People” phenomenon is going to make a lot of people unhappy.  I highly recommend googling “Fake Los Angeles People” and reading the many explanations as to why this happens. It’s important to recognize that this is a common stereotype, but not a rule.

And once you do that, here’s my take:

Why are people from LA perceived as fake?

Some folks blame the entertainment industry, others say its the plastic surgery culture, or that everyone is too superficial to develop meaningful relationships.

I have a different theory.

In a 2008, peer-reviewed study published in Perspectives on Psychological Science, Seattle was ranked the least extroverted city in America.

What are the social implications of a city of introverts like Seattle?  

Newcomers to the area have described Seattleites as being standoffish, cold, distant, and not trusting.  Its so prevalent, this phenomenon is called the “Seattle Freeze.”

Of course, these people aren’t actually giving you the cold shoulder.  They’re just introverts, and they made the rules of socializing in Seattle.  If you want to make friends with an introvert, it requires patience.

In that same study, Los Angeles was ranked the most extroverted city in America.

Dare we ask…What are the social implications of a city of extroverts like Los Angeles?


One extrovert is great. I can handle that. But an entire city?!  I hate referencing this clickbait, but BuzzFeed really nails it.

Everyone in LA is so darn sociable and friendly, but it doesn’t seem genuine when you’re a complete stranger.  I believe this is why people in LA are described as fake.

No, many of them aren’t actually fake. They’re all just deliriously friendly puppy dogs.  But thats not normal for many people, so it comes off as fake.

Anonymous asks:
The Philippines from the beginning of this year became part of Polynesia rather than Asia. So you could still be filo. It’s such an ethnically diverse place anyway

I think you’re referring to the United States Census reclassification of Filipino people from Asian to Pacific Islander?  Well, that was a hoax which the Census Bureau responded to here.

In the same way that congress reclassified pizza as a vegetable, you can’t just pass a law and magically change the underlying genetic makeup of an entire ethnic group.

Thats not how this works.


The majority of Filipinos are descended from Austronesians, a distinct genetic group that includes other ethnicities from Southeast Asia, originating between 3,000 and 1,000BC.  On 23andMe’s genetic test, this shows up as “East Asian.”

The majority of Polynesians have genetic markers that are much older than Austronesians.  We’re talking pre-Holocene era, 12,000BC.  On 23andMe’s genetic test, this shows up as “Polynesian.”

Polynesian people moved quickly amongst the islands, so there is not enough genetic variance to determine which island my ancestors are from…but, we know for certain I have no Asian in me.

Source: Wikipedia

Anonymous asks:
Hi! I am a foreigner, I live in Uruguay in South America; I follow you because I am and admirer of you and your "pets" but I am totally ignorant ( I am so shame about this but I need to be totally sincerely) about yout relationship with your "pets", really I am not understand what kind of relationship is, I mean are you boyfriends? or husbands? or friends? or what? could you explain to me, please? sorry for me english, I speak spanish in my daily life and I need improve my english; thanks!!

Hierarchical poly-fidelity total power exchange style relationships can be hard to explain, even to people who speak English.  So here’s a GIF that accurately summarizes our relationship:

Want more words?  Here’s a very thorough explanation of my relationship, with diagrams and bios.
Anonymous asks:
Wait, how do you RP macrophilia stuff AFK? Do you mimic a larger body with your arms, puff up your cheeks, talk in a deeper voice, pretend furniture is buildings and stuff?

“Crush me.”

Anonymous asks:
Is Tank staying in Australia?? In one of your post you said you were going to miss him.

Tank is spending a couple extra weeks in Australia to handle some paperwork and spend more time with his family.

I miss him very much, but he’ll be home soon :)

Anonymous asks:
Were your calves always big? What would you suggest to bulk up legs, especially calves?

The chart above shows my average calf measurement and bodyweight over the last 10 years.

I’ve gained over 100 pounds of muscle and my calves haven’t really changed much.

If you believe my calves are big now, then yes, they have always been “big” because they haven’t changed much since I started bodybuilding.

Calf size and shape is largely determined by genetics. There is no advice I can give here.

Anonymous asks:
Related to the concerned European. Though you consume from eco farms when possible, isn't it true that those farms can't be scaled to meet global demand? Or to rephrase, if every person on earth consumed eco farm food, what would the land, water, material, and energy use be? I remember reading that those practices, while being better certainly, still don't solve the problem. This isn't meant as an attack on your lifestyle by any means, I eat food from far less sustainable options than you.

The problem is overpopulation.  Factory farming, GMOs, etc, all exist to meet the demand of feeding billions of people.

I use eco consumerism to minimize my impact on the environment in a system that is completely broken.  This is not a solution that will save the Earth.  It will only delay the inevitable doom.

There really isn’t a solution.  The Earth is warming faster than ever, species are disappearing every day, 30 Rock ended prematurely, there is no turning back.

The good news?  Biosystems always find a way of achieving homeostasis.  The problem will eventually sort itself out.

The bad news?  Humans are the problem.  In correcting this equilibrium, the vast majority of human population will be culled as Earth becomes inhospitable for us.

Anonymous asks:
Fascinating blog; I must say. We have a question here in Europe however. 'How many earths would we need if everyone lived like the average American?' Sometimes when reading you blog I can't help noticing you fly constantly around the globe, consume the most incredibly rich and glutinous foods at an alarming pace, incessantly buy new shoes, clothes, sex toys and everything in between. Have you ever wondered on its effect? Yours, a concerned European.

I am single-handedly destroying the world through eating food.

…actually, if you read through my blog you’ll see I try to practice responsible eco consumerism.  I don’t buy that many clothes, I only own one pair of shoes, and the food I eat is sourced from sustainable farms (when possible).

I don’t believe it’s possible for a single human to provide a net positive effect on the environment (we must all practice eco consumerism), but I am consciously trying to make responsible decisions to mitigate my impact.

That being said, it’s rather arrogant for “concerned European” to ask this question considering the poor environmental state of Europe.  Except for Norway and Russia, there are no old growth forests in Europe because of how you live.  The rich and glutinous foods you’re accusing me of eating were invented in Europe.  And don’t even get me started on your air pollution problems.

Anonymous asks:
I know this is a strange question but....Who the fuck holds the camera? You take such good pictures and most of them are always full shots. I am specifically talking about any of the photos that you away from home and there are only 2 of you.

I made this video almost six years ago to illustrate how I do my self portraits.

  1. Position camera with flexible tripod.
  2. Set timer or use remote trigger
  3. Take photo

Here’s the resulting photo:

My technique hasn’t changed much over the last six years, although the technology has improved a lot.  I used to have to take the photo blindly over many takes using a timer…now I can position myself perfectly using a remote view-finder on my smartphone.  Incredible.

Anonymous asks:
I understand this is likely just a miscommunication but your bit about no Black people in Australia comes off as both classist and racist. Specifically your implication that all food court cleaners are black and the exaggeration of the statement.

That was not my intent at all and the post has been updated.  I’m very sorry for the miscommunication and sincerely hope it didn’t offend anyone.

But if it did offend you, please come talk to me. I have written extensively about race issues in the bear community and my own personal experiences with sexual racism…the last thing I want is to alienate people who have endured the same.

Anonymous asks:
About the pumping - when is enough, enough? Is the aim to turn yourselves into cartoon characters à la Tom of Finland?

I’m pretty happy with my size.  I won’t be growing any bigger.

I’ll probably continue ball stretching though.  I still want super low hangers and they’re just not there yet.